Friday, September 16, 2011

An Ideal Boy


Boys prejudice, a lot. Their habit to exaggerate and overrate ant size matter agitates me enough to nitpick on them. For century feminism had been seen low, male driven society is the trend. How come? Can male reproduce? NO. Then how come they rate their maleness above the femaleness? I have been advised by the blog owner to be gentle but parallel runs the veracious me. How can I be gentle when I am living in a state called Delhi, where a damsel is a frail imbecile who is been taught all the aspects of life and later burdened with tones of restrictions?

Now when I think about it, I have learned to live with it. I cannot vent my perpetual crotchety on anyone, solitude was only non-grey option available. Then I asked my friend, “Can I rant on your blog?” With an intriguing eye and not-so-usual face he answered, “Are you nuts? That’s my ranting place.” With a little threatening and boom-puff he frenetically agreed and this was how I got this space; PoV – Musings of an anonymous girl. Account of my musings would be in scarce but every time it will bring a new fervor to me. I hope you relish this feast (Metaphorically said).

Though my first post was scheduled to be a melodrama types, sprinkled with emotions and pain of life but this dude asked me halt my tsunami of thoughts till the next time and attempt something out of the box. So I decided to drag the boys in it. Do not draw an image of a girl who unlike dislike boys, I too like them *Giggles* but sometimes some gets into my nerves, crawl through my arteries and blast my head off. Therefore lately I have been categorizing them under various labels. If you are a boy, you might find it offensive to bear and some might see their reflection in it; if you anyhow flunk to notice yourself in any of the under cited genre then holla, you are an ideal boy.

Let us begin —
You are a teaser: These are the boy who teases, at least that is what they think. I had once encountered such a lad while returning from my college. With an uncontrollable habit of I must impress her he nitpicking his fellow mates.
                Rule: What you see in movie is not always correct. A girl would rather like to run away than to jump into your arm.

You try to strike: This is a class of boys who try to strike a casual conversation for a casual sex with a casual girl at a casual place in a casual pose. When they fail to light up the casualness, they become persistent; ending up perturbing the girl or a harsh beating by the fellow passengers’. There are some benefits which comes handy if you are a girl.

You are so you: Sometimes you will stumble upon some boys who preen loudly, perhaps who are a fashion disaster. Bell bottom yellow pants—rest is quite imaginable. Isn’t it? They even use some strictly feminine cosmetic products. Thank god Shahrukh Khan brought men’s product in market. Else you can find Fiama Di Wills and L’Oreal products in their tightly packed wardrobe.

You are an O: These people should be forbidden. They excessively use emoticons. Call friendship as fraaandship. Sometimes they brag their knowledge about English—the funny language by replacing the similar or almost similar sounding worlds. Imagine a lad standing next to you on a bus stop and the sentence spilled out of his mouth is – I have absorbed her. Now you know what I meant? Observe => Absorb. Sounds so sucker no?

You are such a dash: These are the rulers; ultimate boys. Peek-a-boo is their activity even listed in Facebook info column. They are fearless and concentrated. But the best feature they are embarked with is – rolling eyes. We call them Perverts, if you know what I meant.

You are faulty flaunt'y: When we say Public Display of Affection, it is not always necessary to be “that kind” of affection. Intently staring at the fancy gadget in hand, pretending to make a call even if balance is nil, and invariably trying to bring fake Ed Hardy logo into the line of sight. These are some of the symptoms which I have noticed. Please make a note of it.

You think beyond: More than IIPM, they bring the justice to their slogan. These boys are amusing. Cannot talk to her, so what? I can do “anything” in my solitude. Wait, until I slip into it and then we will……be friends.

The more I ransack my chronicles, the more flusters it become. There will be a time when all “we” could do is…..oh damn I am ending this post here. *Curtains down


  1. I do not like the ones who mention their investment bank profile on blogger, facebook and even twitter. Blooooody Show Offs...


  2. Bell bottom yellow pants remind me of Govinda....interesting categorization.

  3. Sadly this post comes at a time when the beloved boys belonging to various categories and cross categories in the above drawn list would be on tending to their wounds after having their bloated egos mortally wounded by a lady from down south.
    The list might not be comprehensive, but why did you choose to hit them where they were already hurting? Anna Hazare has surely left his impact. Everyone is hitting the iron when hot. :P

    Nice post.

    Blasphemous Aesthete

  4. at least this one is for all boys and not just the ones north of the Vindhyans...

    you have put boys into so many categories...and I thought 'all men are same'...

  5. haha..i echo with SUB's thot..even i thot 'all men r d same' :P
    btw..the categorization is definitely interesting and i could relate to atleast one boy for each one of it' so i guess..all men r NOT d same :D


  6. Hai Prateek,

    nice name u have :)

    @How can I be gentle when I am living in a state called Delhi, where a damsel is a frail imbecile who is been taught all the aspects of life and later burdened with tones of restrictions?

    That's the question for which most parents do no have answer..

  7. interesting post Prateek.....

    but then why it is said that "all men are same"....???

  8. Let me see, is this in any way inspired by the recent Madrasan's letter that caused quite a stir? Also I suppose for every annoying boy out there, you'll find 2 annoying girls too. And I say this being a member of the fairer sex myself. Interesting categories though!

  9. hehehe.. nice categories ;)
    never knew boys come in such varieties :P

  10. nice categories. I can name atleast one person, I know in real life who falls in each of these categories and they are all from Delhi!

  11. wooo
    that was a comprehensive list.... Don't wrry even gals come in different varieties..
    As sayin goes
    Kalyug hai bhai, ghor kalyug :D

  12. I smiled at Blasphemous Aesthete. And totally agree with him. Great timing with the post. Maybe much needed too. :-) I have never had the pleasure of closely interacting with most of these kind of boys. So I found this post extremely informative. :-)

  13. lol an absolute post...hate the gadget show offs.. hehehe ya and the nil balance thingie so very right :) :)


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