Retro-Day in the Life of Engineer Prateek

| This guest post is written by Anita Menon who blogs at Slice of My Life. A heartfelt thank to her for such an "amazing" post.  

Disclaimer: This is entirely a work of fiction with resemblance to only one living person who is none other than Mr. Prateek Bagri. He invited me to do a guest post for his blog and wanted it to be funny/interesting. This is what I have got! I have used some twitter-related parlance such as tweets and mentions.

Guest Post- Retro-Day in the Life of Engineer Prateek

It was a typical summer day at the “Some Institute of Engineering and Technology” but the campus was exceptionally silent. The leaves rustled across the dust beaten cemented compound of the institute. The heat seemed to sizzle the institute's building and the peon checked his watch again. There was still an hour to go before he could ring the bell and announce the end of the examination. Through one of the windows, he noticed a student glance into his classmate’s answer sheet. He shook his head in repugnance. He had seen this year after year, the faces changed but the habits remained unchanged. Suddenly he heard shuffling of feet on the corridor and turned to look. He didn't expect any student to come out of the examination hall so early. He recognized the familiar face immediately. Thats the Bagri boy!! 

Prateek looked from his cell phone and found the peon staring at him. He just shrugged and started to climbed down the institute’s steps with his eyes still glued to his Sony Ericsson W705. He chuckled to himself while he scrolled down his twitter timeline. People can be unbelievably hilarious, he thought to himself. He tweeted,”Exam over. What a relief!" A second later,  ' Ping', he looked to check and found a mention 

Interview: Osama Unplugged

Image courtesy- The Times of India 

With the assassination of world’s #1 most wanted terrorist, Osama Bin Laden; America is living in peace. Whining and winning go hand in hand, (let us say “Clinton—Bush” – “Obama.”) The only place which went with an atmosphere of non-celebration was journalist’s headquarters’ building. With a “dream” of interviewing Osama once in life died with Osama for them. They were left so much dishearten that channels had almost started showing the actual news. Then came a "boy" out of nowhere who posted Osama's interview on his blog; unreal, right!?!

"

He was sitting by the clouds when a care taker called Osama to attend a call from Earth for a special interview. Obama Osama went flabbergasted. Not expecting a fame call can make you go dumb, so got Osama. “Who are you? Human or Jihadi”, asked Osama. “Sir, I am a blogger who wants to interview you and make some money out of it” was his lame reply.

Mom in Friends List. Eh!

Is that a Boy with her?

Why shouldn't you be friend with your parents on Social Networking? —


I take a great honor to write this post for the sake of “us” (I wrote us in “ ” because it somehow correlates “us”). This isn't a stereotype. Making parents friends on Social Network (not the film silly) is something which majority of teens (and some above the teens) do not prefer. After all you would not like your profile to be a subject of daily prying by your parents. They will everyday go by your profile to figure out the changed behavior of their darlings. Perhaps social network (let’s call it”Facebook”) empowers the parents to deeply examine “what’s on their mind?” (here their = Son's/Daughter's) This may sound strange but a “Status Update” is enough to turn their suspect into a firm belief.


Parents are always curious to know the insight of their modern 21st century child; perhaps that is why they ask "us" to open up in front of them; but who know “our open up may shut them down”. A finite distance is something which is ought to be maintained.


On what basis am I shouting? —

The History of "Nothing is Permanent"

This is the story of Epicness. An answer to the question "who is the father of nation the phase Nothing is Permanent". Last night I saw a dream which indirectly gave me the answer to my long searched question to which even Google said "don't you have anything else to search. Duh!". In my dreams Saltasaurus (my "last night dream" pet) gave me a trip to his city. His father Saltasaurus Sr. was a literature/philosophy scholar. Oh! Did I mention, his father framed this simple quote with complexity more than iota. Meanwhile, I was studying his thesis, Saltasaurus's mother cooked Masala Dosa for us; delicious it was. His sister works at a MNC. 

But, going by today I sincerely believe that Fevikwick and M-seal are pretty much "permanent". At least the ape’s descendent's were able to outclass dinosaur’s sayings up to certain extent. No, I won't lay the lame M-seal's dying-father-puts-extra-zero ad here. But will advocate the believes of our great dinosaurs, (who fortunately weren't our ancestors) how their sayings is now literally into practice everywhere.

A Date

My collection was vast

It was a call; last night when I ran into my store room, I didn't want my parents in adjacent room to pry out their sweetheart is talking late night with Someone. A messy and dusty room with a sweet mushy fragrance, that reminded me of something. I got too busy with my call that I almost forgot the fragrance. An hour long call ended. I was tired. Just before I was about to step out of the store room; that majestic fragrance again took over my sensitive nose and I sneezed mildly, mild enough to kill the sound in the room itself.


I looked around – a poster, an old calendar, dusty boxes with useless items were seen lying. But in the corner of the shelf I saw a pink colour box, big and heavy enough to bring me down to sweat. I was eager to see what was encased in it so carefully.


The pink colour box tightly taped. I somehow managed to rip the tape. A familiar “gun” appeared, "Mouser". Yes, I remember this gun. I shot my younger brother with this once. Later he told Mom and rest I don’t wish to discuss here. It was my toy box. Once Four sacks of toys were now somehow got reduced and now they occupy just a mere box. I rolled the box and all my toys were on the floor. Touching each of them was a sheer bliss, brought back everything which was shut in my solitude. Each toy opened a new storyline attached to it. By now I had started dabbling into a room of memories which was remote for quite some time.

Eat, Play and Sleep

I'll kill you, and so will I

Out of every damn thing created by God MAN is the only specie which has been bestowed with this peculiar trait called “Eating”, “Eating” and once again “Eating”. Of course women are also unique but their peculiarities are way much bizarre than men. Eh? I am being sexist. No, it's a sheer fact.

Alright! Coming back to the men. Eating has always been our favorite hobby or even a pass time. Men eat because they are born to eat, it's their birth right. So what is the problem if they're practicing it?
So here I am to answer a few questions (call it FAQs) which often create an ape image of the men—

Q: Why do Men eat weirdly?
A: Simply because they have much more hunger as compared to their counterparts.

Q: Why are men less emotional in comparison to their counterparts?
A: Men are emotional, it is just that men’s tear glands have yet not evolved like that of women’s. Therefore they are incapable of producing drum-full of tears.

Q: If a man has to choose between his Girlfriend and Mc.Aaloo Tikki costing Rs.15, can we rely that he'll be choosing his girlfriend?
A: Are you nuts? Hell NO! Don't you see we live to eat rather than eating to live.Rs.15 Mc. Aaloo Tikki any day!!!. Mc.Aaloo Tikki costs above Rs.20 exclusive of 12.5% VAT. We cannot leave any eatable item which is provided below MRP.

Do We Really Have a Future? I Doubt

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Earth on development

On the cost of resources, developments were made. There was a time when robotics matched human’s mind. Humans’ paradox to notch luxury was constantly permuting the advancement and soon was a time when the robots were able to surpass their creators in every possible field. They had now started thinking independently for themselves.

___ 

They were everywhere

They were now in a state to claim their superiority over their creators. Unknown of the outcomes man tend to bend his living and lifestyle degree by degree. One day Machines rebuked and started their rebellion.

___

A mother in 3011 era tells her son the past of the Earth—

Humans were being exterminated by the machines. We were left with no choice than to leave the planet Earth. And that was the time when we decide to elope and settle on a plant light years from the Earth, 'Xnor'. And this was how it ended.

P.S This is a mere science fiction inspired from my brother's venture.

Did HE Make It Happen?

Chicken Soup for the Soul

Circa 2005—

It was late winters when a mere 15 year old boy was seriously clinched within the arms of a newly spreading viral disease. Unknown of this disease, it was mistook for a viral and the treatment was also done accordingly. 10 days later when fever seems to be unevenly trending and decreasing his parents in worry. A sudden outburst of nausea made his parents mind to take him to the nearest hospital. The boy kept asking what is going on with him but all his questioned were suppressed with a smile by his mother and were unanswered.

From my hazy memories I can tell it was the day of Diwali or a day before Diwali. Only some wardens and junior doctors were found. They weren't able to decipher, the actual cause of this uncanny behavior shown by the fever over past 10 days. After much of the examination they asked his parents to take the boy to home and come after 2-3 days but his mother wasn't ready to accept the idea and asked to admit him. After much of a conversation a Doctor showed up and started examining the boy. The boy went unconscious and doctor called it a case of emergency. Several blood tests later it was discovered that he wasn’t clinched by any ordinary flu it was Dengue. His parents were unable to gulp the fact that their piece of heart is resting with the most newly and deadly disease of the present time.

A sudden shock wave came when his platelets started dipping. The boy was struggling within his own solitude. He got an internal liver bleeding and was losing everything now. A healthy human being has 1, 50,000 to 4, 00,000 platelets count in his blood but the boy's platelets count dipped to 16000. Doctors called it off. His parents were told to take the boy with them, everything is going in vein. There wasn’t any use of giving him more platelets, already 6 packets were syringed into his body, also the machine use to segregate platelets from blood wasn’t nearby, his father has to travel 30 kilometers in chilly winter’s nights to get there.